There is a great organisation called the FEU (Federation of Entertainment Unions) and as a member of the Writer’s Guild I am eligible to apply for free courses.  I have just completed a course called ‘Blogging for Creative Freelancers’.  It was led by William Gallagher and it was genuinely helpful.    The point was made that here we were a roomful of writers all struggling to write.   Others who would not call themselves writers appear to have no problem at all.  Maybe that is par for the course!  I left fired up and energised.

Then I sat to blog and went blank.  I remembered – don’t get overwhelmed.

So a few tips from people much better at this than I:

1. Do it.  No point in having a blog and not writing in it.  You’re a writer for goodness sake, write! 
2. Find a theme for your blog and write around that.  One person on the course wanted to write about the state of the care home industry.  He was incensed by it.  We all encouraged him to go for it.  Write about something you know.  Someone else suddenly realised they loved biking, did it every day in London.  Another said they liked rom coms did anyone else?  I along with one other person put their hand up. I love them. I like a friendly, feelgood film with a happy ending.  Can’t help it.  Even trying to write a rom com book as I write this blog.  There are people who blog about rom coms.  I shall be searching them out.
3. Don’t simply write to promote what you are doing – the world is bigger than that and the great danger is we bore everyone to death. 
4. Blogging is a great way to connect with other like-minded people 
5. Here’s an exercise for you:   make a list of at least five things you know about.  Pick one of those five things and name five things you could write about in that area.  You will be amazed at what is inside you.  

Happy blogging!

Reflection is, for me, an essential tool for learning and for thinking.   I reflect usually first thing in the morning.  It is an important part of my faith and easily turns into prayer.

Reflection gives me a sense of perspective.   I consider my work and jobs to be done and ask myself questions.  What are my priorities?  What do I need to prepare for?  Is there preparation time in the diary?   I think about my relationships. Is there anyone I want to see?  Does anyone need particular care or attention? 

Reflection helps me learn from my mistakes.  If I have treated someone poorly how can I put that right?  Do I need to apologise?   Have I made an unwise decision?  Can I put it right?

Reflection also helps me discover new ideas.  This is an exciting part.  I am always creating.  As I reflect on a particular piece of writing it is amazing how so often a fresh thought will jump into my head which I can translate into my work.  

Reflection helps me ‘see’ those around me. It gives me listening ears and an open heart.  It allows me to meditate about them in the most loving way possible.  I was reflecting on a friend’s comment regarding her child.  My friend seemed out of sorts. When I saw her with her husband and her older child, things were abrasive between them.  As I reflected on her words I realised what she had said describing her child was her own reality.  I had a fresh perspective.

Reflection helps me live in peace.  Life happens and can be full of turmoil, unlike the picture.  Yet even though a storm may rage, it is still possible to live from a place of peace. May you know peace today.

Just lean back, close your eyes and let go. Trust me. I won’t let you down.

Feel me behind you, around you, holding you up.

My power is more tangible than the wind, warmer than the sun.

Feel it soar around you, feel it beat upon your face

Sway – dizzy-headed but safe no tension in your being buffeted by the waves of my love.

Lean into me – I will support you

Lean forward – I will catch you

Lean backwards – I will be there

Lean sideways balance on the currents of air

As I breathe on you

I WILL NOT LET YOU FALL.

Lift your face to meet my kiss

Reach and I will lift you

Up, where the wind will roar in your ears, play with your hair

Up, where the sunlight bathes

Gliding, soaring, spinning

Trust me

I WILL NOT LET YOU FALL

by Rosie Pru

What do you take on a journey?  Depends on the journey.  Last Christmas we were unable to be together as a family.  We have two adult children, both married, one couple live near us, another in Sierra Leone.  However, there was a window of opportunity, grasped by my daughter’s husband.  He and my daughter were on route to Malaysia to a friend’s wedding and had a ten hour stopover in Paris.  Why didn’t we all meet up for lunch?  Eurostar was duly booked, and for the journey I packed croissants, cheese and jam (breakfast on the train); Christmas presents; Christmas musical crackers. Yes we did wear our Christmas hats in the restaurant to the bemusement of the other diners.

The gentleman who had packed the basket on the sand had one other thing he carried, a fishing rod and line, to fish in the sea.

For another type of journey we may only take who we are and who we believe in.

I look confident to other people, but I am the sort of person who can get knocked off my perch so easily. As soon as that happens then the voices begin. They say ‘I am no good’ that ‘I could never hope to finish what I have in my hands’ that ‘I might as well give up now’.

It happened the other day.  I was told that the project I have been working on for months was unlikely to proceed.  At that point I spiralled down into an abyss and agreed in my spirit it was probably best to stop.

But, I spoke to a friend who understood. That friend believed in me and believed in what I was doing. That friend thought of a way forward. Together we talked to God.  That night I slept fitfully.

The next morning I thought no, I will not give up. This is what I am supposed to be doing. I can do this. I will do this.  Somehow  iron had entered my soul. A fresh determination had filled my being and I spoke to the heavens. ‘No’ I said, ‘I will do this’.  I made a phone call. The iron in my soul transferred into another. Together we planned a pathway.

Arthur standing on the cliff-top in Tintagel has wind blowing through him. The elements are strong against him, yet still he stands. He is made of iron.

May I and you be built to withstand the storms.

May we refuse to give up.

May we say ‘No’ into the heavens and fight on.

May God put iron in our soul whatever cliff we might find ourselves upon.

FLOWERING CHERRY at The Finborough Theatre   ****

Nov 19 2015

This play was last produced in London over 50 years ago and Finborough have done it again and uncovered a gem of a play.  I realise I have loved a lot of Robert Bolt’s work, but had never seen or heard of this and was bowled over by the power of it last night. His first West End play no wonder it ran for well over 400 performances on its original showing at the Royal Court.

Apparently compared to Arthur Miller’s Death of a Salesman when it was originally produced in 1957 with Ralph Richardson and Celia Johnson playing Isobel and Jim Cherry.  Now played by Liam McKenna and Catherine Kanter who did a great job holding the whole piece together.  In this fine performance she was the typical 1950’s wife in her printed pinny, turning on a sixpence trying to hang onto her marriage to a fantasist.  Finally she calls his bluff and offers him everything he has dreamt of and his fear stops him, her need for self-preservation kicks in.

Jim is a man lost in a dream which is to buy a farm and grow apple trees.  He wants to try to recreate the place he grew up in.  He is caught up in a job as an insurance salesman which he purports to hate.   His life is filled with fantasy and posturing, bragging about giving in his notice, fuelling his life by the ever present barrel of scrumpy which he drinks constantly, augmenting it with gin.

His two children Judy and Tom only serve to highlight his failing life and his refusal to confront the reality of his condition.  His wife is a centre of morality, struggling to impart important values into her children, concerned all the while that they will stray and fail as human beings.   The daughter it seems has caught the fantasy of her father;  the son, self-aware and intelligent, recognises and sees his father.  His shattered respect for him makes him determined not to become like him and he yearns to leave, waiting anxiously for his call-up papers.

Jim, painfully for all, has no self-awareness. Frosty Isobel holds herself tightly throughout it all.    The children are pointedly exasperated at their parents.  I can imagine it would be difficult to relate to all these characters . Not so for me as, as my age,  it all had a ring of authenticity for that era.  Jim’s pointed descent into fantasy and self-delusion is at times excruciating and alienating.

I was delighted by the transformation of the Finborough space into a 50’s home, kitchen window and outside patio.  It seats about 50 and is a wonderfully intimate and exciting space.

I couldn’t help thinking of my own father who in 1957 would have been 33 with two young children and a new baby.   He was somewhat of a fantasist who had also become a salesman.  He believed he was chosen and destined for greater things.  He also, as so many did, drank too much.  But my father’s life was interrupted by the war.  He was indeed destined for much and his greatest love was music and playing the piano.  At 17 he found himself in a war fighting for his life and the lives of others.  It was something he never spoke about.   My heart went out to Jim, who also would have been in that war long before anyone knew or talked about PTSS (post traumatic stress symptom).  Putting a life back together after such a trauma would be a challenge for anyone.

I have also finally uploaded Catch: Photobook as best I can with my limited website skills. Enjoy.

Why have I posted a picture like this?  Not one of mine but it has caught the moment for me.

I have just started something very challenging and I hope it will change me.  At least not the inside me, but the outside me.  I have started ballet classes for the over 55’s.  The joy is that I have begun this with my sister.

Now my sister years ago was an actual real life ballet dancer and belonged to a company of dancers and wore tutus and stuff like that.  Me I have always enjoyed dancing and did ballet till I was about fourteen years old.

I have since learnt to do modern jive, a bit of swing, but I have longed for the barre and maybe even a tutu or two!

My first class was a delight and very very funny.  The words ‘fairy elephant’ came to mind.  We had to do something at the barre standing on one leg and sticking the other one out.  I couldn’t do it for the life of me, but I did laugh.  The thing I love about dancing is that it is such life-affirming fun.

We need to do things that are life-affirming, that are fun, that feed the soul, and dancing is one of those things for me.   I will look at this picture and yet I will not yearn – I will do. Perhaps not, perhaps never what I see in my imagination or like the lovely young woman pictured, but I won’t be standing on the sidelines, I will be dancing out loud.

Lately I have been struck when talking to friends, how few of them give any time for self-reflection.  To me it is invaluable tool as it allows me to think about what I have done in my work, my relationships, my social interaction and review its appropriateness and/or effectiveness and to bring challenge to myself.  I can question myself in a positive way and think about whether I should carry on or whether there is some check or balance I should bring.

I recently had a conversation with my sister and as I thought about it I wondered whether I had done something to upset her. I can do things unknowingly so I approached her and asked her the question. As it happened I hadn’t but was relieved that I didn’t have to live with a sense of disquiet any longer.

It is obviously important to think about the work we do. Can we do it better? Could/should I change something? Whatever the many roles we live whether at home or at work, reflection is such an important part of our learning.

A few years ago recognising that I was depressed I took time to reflect about all the changes that were occurring in my life and whether I needed change.  As often happens for me, someone gave me a book and that book helped me chart a course that took me eventually into studying for an MA in Screenwriting.

For me keeping a daily journal was incredibly helpful.  I do think creating something that externalises our self-reflection is important.  It allows us to look back on our journey and reflect on what we see.

Change can be so positive if we approach it well and give ourselves time to think. I have heard it said that to incorporate a complete sea-change in our lives takes about 7 years from inception to completion.

Reflective questions to ask ourselves:

• Strengths – What am I good at?  What can I do well?  We often can think of our weaknesses but struggle with our strengths.  How can I use these more?
• Weaknesses – What are my weaknesses? Would I like to strengthen some of them?
• Skills – What skills do I have and what am I good at? What do I love to do that I have set aside for different reasons?
• Difficulties – Are there any difficulties at work or at home that affect me? Do I feel overburdened, stressed, lacking space in my life?
• Successes – What are the markers in my life that I like and am proud of?
• Happiness – Are there things that I am unhappy with or disappointed about? What makes me happy? What brings me joy?
• Keys – as I look at the different areas of my life are there any keys I can identify that would enhance it?

Self-reflection can feel difficult, a waste of time especially if we are ‘doing’ people.  If it doesn’t come naturally to us then it might feel selfish or embarrassing.   But practice helps enormously and can allow us to gently bring positive change into our lives.

1. Be honest with ourselves.  We can express what we feel any way we wish. We will be  the only ones reading what we write or create.
2. Maybe decide to separate different areas of our life. Reflect on them individually so we have a plan during our time of reflection.
3. Do speak to others. If we discover things and are unsure what they mean do share with someone else. We are not meant to be alone trying to work things out.  The company of a friend or two on the journeys we take are invaluable.
4. Find a quiet place. Do have something to hand, ie a pen and paper, to map out  thoughts.
5. Do a breathing exercise. Inhale and exhale as many times as is comfortable. For every breath in, perhaps speak something out. It can be very helpful to speak out loud.
6. Pour out your emotions. Allow ourselves to cry if we need to. Write down our feelings.
7. There are so many truly helpful books to help us get perspective, understanding and self-revelation.
8. Focus at times on the difficult things.

• Focus on events that happened and everything around them. How did we feel about them? How did we react and why?
• Learn to understand all perspectives of the situation. Maybe we were irrational at first; maybe we were right in our actions.
• Let go of any negative feelings or grudges we still hold. Try and understand our misery or anger it will help us grow and develop as a person.
• Return to the present with a fresh sense of perspective

9. Practice thankfulness – having a thankful heart is wonderfully healing.
10. Do something – what have we seen and understood? Is there something positive that we need to do?  Be brave, be courageous.

As a God follower part of my self-reflection includes prayer, reading and meditation on the God who loves us beyond measure.